Baby is Already Making it's Debut!

11 Weeks

I forgot to post this last weekend but this was Valentine's Day when I was 11 weeks and starting to show already...more like the chubby phase but still never showed this early with the last 2!  Maybe that had something to do with being so sick my last two pregnancies I always lost weight in the first trimester because it was so difficult to keep anything down!  I am now 12 weeks!  I have been sick a few times but nothing I can complain about considering my past pregnancies.  Just really tired all the time,  

We had an early ultrasound because we couldn't get a heartbeat at my midwife appointment...same thing has happened with all 3 pregnancies...

Heart rate was 168 bpm so I'm thinking it's a girl right?  

I'm happy either way since I love both my girl and boy but it's fun to speculate!

It was an awesome Valentine's Day, my hubby and I don't really ever celebrate the holiday but we had this ultrasound and brought the kids and they were showering me with love and affection throughout the ultrasound, so excited to see the baby! They kept trying to kiss my tummy while it was covered with that ultrasound jelly!

My Christmas Present

I know this is a little late and after the fact, but I haven't blogged in a while so I thought I'd fill ya'll in!

For Christmas this year my husband wanted to get me a new sewing machine so I could be done with (and possible smash to bits with a hammer) my old brother sewing machine that I got on BlackFriday at Walmart for $50 a couple years ago. I am surprised at how much I actually did make with that machine but I swear everything took2-3 times longer because of the constant problems....anyways....so by the time Christmas came we hadn't purchased a new sewing machine yet because I'm still trying to figure out what I want.  

So for the sake of having something wrapped up and under the tree for me on Christmas, my husband has this tradition of going to the Dollar Store with his dad and brother on Christmas Eve and picking up some random things.  As a joke, he bought my mom a home drug test since she lives in WA and marijuana was just legalized there along with the fact that my mom usually has her essential oil diffuser running in the kitchen and the guys always tease her that it looks like a bong.  So that was funny to watch my LDS mom open on Christmas morning as a gag.  While she opened it and was laughing, I was handed a small gift from Tyler that said on the tag "Don't say I didn't give you anything for Christmas!"  and as I opened it up, it was a pregnancy test from the dollar store!  It was a total joke. I my have said something along the lines of "TYLER!" and quickly stashed it away in embarassment. I had forgotten about it until a day or two later he was about to go out to a shooting range with his Dad and Brother and before he left made a comment "Wouldn't that be awesome if you used that test and you actually WERE pregnant?!?"  I laughed like it was impossible and made some comment like "I'm pretty sure I'm not!" and didn't think much of it...until an hour or two after he left his comment came back to my mind and curiosity got the best of me, even though I really didn't think I was.  I took the Dollar Store Pregnancy test and this is what it read

Two lines....that means positive!  I was super excited and surprised but at the same time realized it was a DOLLAR STORE TEST so it doesn't count.  So later on I picked up another test from Walgreens and this time did it when Tyler was with me since I've just told him I was preggers the last 2 times and he'd never seen a test before.  The next one seemed to be a dud....nothing was happening. I started to get frustrated and shaking it up and down to get that pee to run down towards the results box since it wasn't doing it on it's own...we were about the give up and throw it in the trash...when finally the plus sign started to appear!  

So, even though I still haven't picked out my new sewing machine, I can't say that Tyler "didn't get me anything for Christmas" that's for sure!

A little back story-We originally wanted to start trying towards the end of spring 2012 but then we found out we would be moving to a new state and decided to wait until after we were moved and settled...which we thought would take like 2 months to sell our house and buy our next but obviously things haven't gone that way.  As the months passed we both still had it strongly on our hearts and finally not long ago, decided...you know what? it could be a year or more by the time we sell our house move and are settled and it could take up to a year to get pregnant after that!  It took 8-9 months to get pregnant with our 2nd. So we decided to place it in God's hands as his timing has proven time and time again to be much better than our own timing.  So we weren't TRYING, but we were just not worrying about it and trusting the Lord.  I was so surprised and didn't think it was possible because we had barely made that decision to put it in God's hands so that is why we were surprised to have a + result so soon!  And I am very thankful because I know what it's like to get frustrated when it's not happening right when you want and I know plenty of people wait a lot longer than I did with my 2nd so I am NOT taking this for granted at all.  

Also, the other concern we had and why we originally held off on baby #3 was because my past 2 pregnancies were HORRIBLE!  I was so sick I always lost weight, could barely function for more than half the pregnancy because the sickness was so terrible...and when I wasn't puking all day then I had debilitating migraines.  Our concern was how am I going to take care of 2 kids, homeschool one of them and keep the house clean for showings when I am that incapacitated!  But we gave it all up to the Lord and amazingly I have only been sick 2-3 times...both times revolved around a migraine but I have been to a chiro a couple times and that also seems to be helping.  And rather than puking my guts out non stop like I did the last 2 pregnancies....I actually have to eat like every 1.5-2 hours or else I start to feel crappy. I am not used to having a real appetite like this, especially eating while pregnant and not puking right after every time.  

I'm a little over 10 weeks right now and the only major complaints I have is being really really tired....oh and as my 5 year old informed the nurse at my prenatal visit with my midwife as we went over my medical history and symptoms she piped in "AND she has a lot of tutti frutti!" the nurse was confused and I was turning red. She asked her what Tutti Frutti meant and J plugs her nose and says "you know, pee-eww! like the baby has a poopy diaper or something!" then the nurse looked at me confused as I was laughing and I said "She's trying to tell you I have more gas than I used to!"  

And on that note....I figured I'd share our Christmas Family Portrait.  My two younger brothers in the back not standing next to any females are available :)  

Summer Days

Summer Days

I know I've been quiet around here, so I thought I'd update on how we are spending our summer days, so far....

Started our Y.O.L.O summer journal list along with a summer bucket list for ideas (got this idea from the Brassy Apple)

On the to-do list, J said she wants to put on sunglasses and walk around the neighborhood...

Practicing writing skills...

Going to the carnival

Backyard games and campout night (laid on blanket watching bats and fireflies, telling stories and then came in at 10 to go to sleep in real beds)

Making yummies in the kitchen...Peanut Butter Crispy Treats with chocolate topping

Rainbow Toes

Spray Parks

Playing in a creek in NJ

A couple days in New Jersey

A couple days in Conneticut

B learned that ocean water is yucky!

What is your family up to this summer?

Consequences

Consequences

Give them when necessary, but maybe let the knowledge of the consequence sink in and watch your child do the right thing on their own...

How could this sweet silly girl ever get in trouble???

Well, I'm no parenting expert, just in the trenches of motherhood like the rest but occasionally we discover things as we go, and not necessarily on purpose or to any credit of our own.  Lately I've discovered something about consequences...

I warned J that all her dresses (yes ALL dressups, skirts, play dresses, church dresses) would be taken away for a week if certain behavior continued....It finally got to the point that I had to stop warning and follow through and she was SO angry and defiant about the consequence.  When we got home, however, we were busy getting dinner ready so I figured I'd physically take the dresses away when we went upstairs to get ready for bed.  In the time between getting home and getting upstairs, J had time to calm down and think it over, she talked to us about it and we were able to explain to her again, but now with her calm and listening rather than having a freak out, why she could not act that way and why we had to take her dresses away to help her remember to listen and to treat her family members with kindness.  Anyways, by the time we went upstairs for bed, she was the one taking all the skirts, dresses and dressup clothes away into my art room.  She was vigilant about making sure I found every single skirt in her dresser.  Funny though, after it was time for bed and she saw her empty closet, she got this look on her face and said, almost as if she was just thinking out loud..."why did I help?"  This was last saturday and it was a pretty effective consequence since she didn't get to wear a dress to church on sunday...she almost didn't want to go to church because of that.  I can tell you what though, she has been an amazing big sister to her brother this week in response to that...for the most part.

A couple days later, she had a 2nd incident at a friends house where I felt the need to replace something that she had somehow ruined...not on purpose but by not being careful or thinking about what she was doing.  Both times it was something small, but still.  When the 2nd incident happened, I told her this time she had to help pay for it with her own money.  I had no idea she even valued her money yet, but apparently she really does. She had about the biggest blowup screaming "I'LL NEVER PAY MY MONEY!!!!!"  She was so angry about the consequence of having to use her own money to help replace the item.  Then yesterday when we stopped by their house to give them the replacement, she was screaming at me all the way there in the car, how she will never help pay for it, and how she was going to make me pay for everything...to which I replied "I already do...and I paid for the princess flashlight we replaced and now this"...anyways....lots more 5 year old sassiness.  I stayed calm and just kept telling her, "it's already happening, you are going to pay $1 of your money to help pay for it".  Anyways...not on purpose, but just like the dress consequence...I didn't get around to actually physically following through and taking her money yet because of being busy and distracted, but she knew it was already decided.  So today, sweet look on her face, she came down to me, stood there, looked down fiddling her feet and hands and said "I want to help pay my money for the flashlight AND the toothpaste...both of them, can you help me get my piggy bank down?"  

Wow.....yesterday she told me she wasn't going to have a mom ever again in her defiance over having to help pay for the toothpaste (it was a brand new tube and she squeezed it all out and I wanted her to learn not to do stuff like that, especially at other people's houses) and now today she willingly wants to pay me back for both items.  I was really happy I didn't have to pry her hands off her piggy bank to get the dollar from her and that she had thought about it enough to decide she should help pay for the first item as well.  We went up to her room together and counted out $1.00  

So my new realization from these 2 recent incidents is that it seems to really work well when you tell them what the consequence is, staying calm...they can freak out over the consequence, but you are still calm and then...let it sink in, talking about it when they ask in a calm way and explain to them how important it is to obey mom and dad, treat others nicely, not be destructive, etc and how we give them consequences to help them learn so they don't forget and do the same thing again. Because we love them and want to help them be great people, and that means we have to make sure they don't think it's ok do do certain things or act certain ways.  Then, after the fact, see if they put the consequence into action themselves, willingly because they know it's the right thing.  It seems way more effective (and easier) than doing it in the heat of the moment...prying her off the dresses or piggy bank and having a traumatic experience as we take her dresses away or her money away.  The tantrum ABOUT the consequence is bad enough, I am really liking the part when she cools down after a a couple hours or a day and then happily HELPS put the consequence into action.

I dunnno...at least it's working for us right now....anyone else have similar experiences?  How do YOU handle consequences?  Maybe you only do positive reinforcement?  We do both, trying to be as encouraging and positive as we can, but sometimes consequences need to happen...